Thanks, Dinah!
Posts filed under Rants/Raves
I Knew It!
Florida: Worst Drivers in The Nation
Don't argue with me on this, because it's the indisputable truth.
The hubs and I are in Florida. When we're on the road, it's white-knuckle city.
Nearly every single driver (I'm not exaggerating) is on a cell phone. No Bluetooth action---I'm talking straight-up holding the phone to the ear with one hand and driving with the other. Turn signals are not used. Cutting off other drivers seems to be state law. Drivers aged teen to 50-something driving at such high rates of speed that you can't understand how the poor, slowpoke retirees can remotely tolerate living here.
I thought New Mexico and the Bay Area had the worst drivers. Now, I say no way... not compared to these fools... not by a long-shot.
We're doing a lot of driving during this trip. Pray for us. Seriously.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XpL7wdNgbvk
It's Shut Up Friday!
I just realized that my last two posts involved me instructing people to shut up. Hmmmm. Think perhaps I need to step back and be a bit more polite, as I certainly don't want to end up sounding like this jackass.
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XrNl6-j9x5w]
Get the Barf Bag Ready
Michael Vick is complaining to the press that he misses his dogs.
Yes, the same Michael Vick who was prosecuted a few years ago for financing extensive dog fighting activities and participating in the abuse, torture and execution of under-performing dogs.
In a new GQ interview, Vick whines:
"I miss dogs, man. I always had a family pet, always had a dog growing up. It was almost equivalent to the prison sentence, having something taken away from me for three years. I want a dog just for the sake of my kids, but also me. I miss my companions.”
Sorry, Mike. I don't feel the least bit sorry for you, man. Your previous treatment of dogs is sickening. Yes, since your arrest and incarceration, you've made numerous public statements against animal abuse... but c'mon, we're not that stupid... that's the work of your PR pros. Please, do us all a favor: Shut the hell up and just play football.
Vick’s probation is scheduled to end in 2012, at which time it’s expected he'll be able to legally own a dog.
Jeer of the Day
Thumbs-down to French lingerie label, Jours Apres Lune. Target market: Girls age 4-12.
Yes, a lingerie label for kids. Totally inappropriate!!! Four-year-old children probably shouldn't even know what lingerie IS. They should be in pull-ups, not bras.
The label's web site (which I won't mention here because I'm already promoting this b.s. enough by mentioning it) shows little girls wearing makeup, up-dos and pearls and---of course---the lingerie. Naturally, I'm not posting any pics.
This crosses the line. Period.
Commentator FLIPS OUT Over Debt Debate!
Please take a moment and absorb Dylan Ratigan's incredibly passionate diatribe about the country's debt and credit downgrade. It doesn't matter if you're a Democrat, Republican or otherwise; Ratigan's words are the real deal. Please share this with your peeps!
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gIcqb9hHQ3E]
Bill Bennett: America sucks because Amy Winehouse won a Grammy three years ago
Click here to read about why Reagan's drug czar, Bill Bennett, pinpoints the start of America's decline to Amy Winehouse's Grammy win three years ago.
(Handy tip: read through to the gambling part. Scandal!)
Um... oh-kaaay. So everything was rosy before 2008, Bill?
Let's All Behave Ourselves Online, Shall We?
OK, so I just checked Daily Mail's coverage of the arrival of Ivanka Trump's baby.
She let The Donald announce the name: Arabella Rose. Cute, right? Naturally, this is front-page news. It's a big deal. Big enough to be ranked high on Mail's relevance list.
Here's the kicker: the comments.
Beautiful name! Finally someone who didn't name her kid Eiffel, Shark or Winnie the Pooh! - Cindy, Paris, 18/7/2011 20:17
People who are called 'Cindy' really shouldn't comment on other people's names. - Samantha, London, 18/7/2011 20:47
People are so, so, sooooo bitchy online. Just because you know that person doesn't know you or where you live---thus rendering them unable to kick your sorry ass after you cyber-slam them---doesn't mean you shouldn't abandon your manners whilst communicating via the Internets.
Be nice, for crying out loud. Just do it. Just be nice. Sheesh.
Seriously?!? Who Does This?!?
Joseph Viganola of New Jersey, that's who.
And what did he do? He started a brush fire in Scottsdale, Arizona after setting off flaming projectile fireworks on the Pinnacle Peak hiking trail.
The last thing that poor, wildfire-ravaged state needs is another fire, Mr. Viganola. If you've not noticed, it's incredibly hot, dry and windy. Knock it off! And tell all the other fireworks-obsessed people to chill out this year. This goes for those here in New Mexico, as well.
Call me a curmudgeon, but I hope they ban fireworks this year. They're just so dangerous in ignorant hands, and conditions are scary-dry and windy.
P.S. Is it me, or has it been windy here in Abq for, like, three months straight now? We're giving Chicago a run for its money, right here.
Via azcentral.com
"Rant" of the Day
Unnecessary quotation marks will likely remain high on the list of Things That Bug the Hell Out of Me 'til I'm dead and gone. Found this gem at my corner bodega.
"This" blogger wishes you would've "tried" harder in English "class." It's an eyesore, damn it.
If you're like me, you'll be mortified-yet-fascinated here, at The "Blog" of "Unnecessary" Quotation Marks.
Dear America: This Totally Sucks!
I might need to move to China, eat pickled frogs and lounge around in antibacterial underwear, because I'm officially über-ashamed of our country right now.
Why? Are you ready for this? I'm not sure that you are. Pause and take a deep breath, because you're about to hear some seriously stupid news.
The most-photographed attraction in New York City is......
The Apple store on Fifth Avenue.
Yes, the computer store. Not Rockefeller Center... not Times Square... not Central Park... the g.d. Apple store. Shamefully, shaaaaamefully true.
It feels like somebody stepped on a butterfly inside my heart right now. I'm gonna go barf... or listen to Morrissey... or both. Too bad there isn't a recording of Morrissey barfing. Efficient.
Via TechNews Daily
It's Circus Day!
Happy Circus Day, dahling.
Do something brave and/or clownish. I'm opting for the latter.
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NLo10VHky64&feature=fvst]
Click here to find out what I really think of the circus.
Am I Missing Something?
Why the f*ck is everyone obsessing over Pippa Middleton?
All the rags are claiming she "stole the show."
She totally did NOT steal the show. It was allll Kate's, dahling. Pippa's the cute, composed and spunky (though she didn't seem especially spunky, with a nickname like Pippa, that automatically reaps elevated spunk status) kid sis. That's IT. End of story. Everybody knock it off. Thanks in advance.
An Open Letter to Abercrombie Kids
Dear Abercrombie Kids,
Really?!? Padded bikini tops for eight-year-old girls? Sigh.
Plastic surgeons around the globe must be incredibly stoked due to all the future clients you're giving them. Padding only goes so far, honey, then you want the real deal. Trust me, I'm well-versed here.
Hugs & kisses,
Lisa
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EKTtqSkplWU]
My Sister is an Antagonist Bitch.
OK, so I'm sitting here in my home office, quietly working... minding my own business... when a text message pops up from my sister, Kelly, who lives about 1,300 miles away.
Sister: REDRUM
Me: Ohhhh, shit.
Sister: Bored... just messin with you
Me: Bitch, I will choke you out. Now I've got the image of the old lady in the tub stuck in my head. Infernal cackling.
Sister: Sweet dreams : )
I am so afraid of The Shining. It could be 2:15 p.m. (which it is), and that flick STILL gets me all creeped-out.
Great, now I'm sitting here petrified, waiting for that crazy bathtub crone to jump out from any nook and/or cranny in my chic treehouse and chase me around with her putrid, pruny skin flapping... cackling all the while. I'm dead, for sure.
Technology is the Devil!
Technology is totally kicking my ass today.
It's barely 10 a.m., and I've already sought support in the form of forums, online chat and phone calls due to problems with...
I. Am. Frustrated.
Sigh.
Breathing through it.
On a positive note, my Titanium Sapphire Oscillator is running flawlessly this morning.
So I got that goin' for me.
No, I'm NOT on Facebook
I am a modern day leper. People fah-reeeak out when they find out I'm FB negative.
I simply have zero interest in the service. Not doin' it.
Sue me.
Sheesh!
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L2ViW5ZJrAA&feature=player_embedded]